Fun with closed captioning

We regularly have the closed captioning on, on the TV, which lets us turn the TV down when D. is sleeping and lets us follow dialogue when he's playing noisily, and sometimes the captioning is pretty entertaining. Today I learned about some "navel battles," and also about how for the ancient Etruscans, the dolphin symbolized a fertility symbol known as a "fallace." The funniest, though, was in a show about those two-thousand-year-old terra cotta warriors excavated in China. The emperor who ordered them made, you see, had a problem with the Confusion religion and even had 400 Confusion scholars executed.